Nom, Nom, Nom: Fruit Pizza

Fruit Pizza! There are few things better than Fruit Pizza on a hot-ass summer day. This simplest of simple recipes is always a big hit at the parties I bring it to, and I usually have to snag a piece early in the party to save for later or they’re all gone! A word to the wise though, cut the bananas at the very last moment. Even though they are still perfectly good for quite some time, people get weirded out by brown banana slices.

What you’ll need:

– pizza baking sheet. They have one-time use aluminum ones in your grocer’s baking aisle, but I found that if you buy a permanent one, it can motivate you or your significant other to make other scrumptious circular delights.

-already-made sugar cookie dough roll, because it fits perfectly on a pizza baking sheet

– your favorite fruits. I usually go with the crowd favorites strawberries, raspberries, blueberries and bananas. If I want to make people try new things, I slice up the tiniest bit of mango, kiwi and and star fruit.

– whipped cream. I usually just buy plain ol’ Cool Whip because it’s fast, but according to your dietary needs, you can always use soy-whip, or the real deal.

photo creditfruit-pizza-individualSo, let’s get started!

1. Preheat your oven and soften your cookie dough a little bit. I like to do this as soon as I take the cookie dough out of the fridge, or else I forget. If your dough is too hard/frozen/in a block, stick it on the back part of the stovetop, where the heat escapes, for JUST A LITTLE WHILE. I do not recommend leaving it there for an unspecified amount of time because the smell of burning plastic does not mix well with fruit, cream and sugar cookie.

2. Spray the pizza pan with non-stick cooking spray (lightly) and spread the cookie doughover the entire pizza pan. Do not knead the dough, just work it into a flat, pizza-like crust.

3. Toss in oven for specified amount of time. I usually keep checking on it after the 10 minute mark to make sure it doesn’t burn.

 4. While it is cooking, be slicing up your fruit. Small, easy-to-nibble pieces. Do not try to choke friends and loved ones.

5. Cool cookie dough. I cannot strees enough that this giant sugar cookie must completely cool down before you slather on the whipped cream. It will melt and become clearish, resulting in a ruined fruit pizza. People will cry. Children will point and scream “dear God what is that thing?” I’m sorry to put The Fear into you, but if it will make you wait, my job is done.

6. Slather on the whipped cream and place fruit. Put just enough cream to cover the dough; putting too much will negate the somewhat healthiness of this dessert. I usually place the fruit in a pattern, but break the rules: make one  slice just blueberries, another strawberries only. Spell the name of a friend, lover, or favorite pet. Or throw the slices on the ‘za with reckless abandon. Whatever you wish.

7. ENJOY! Nom Nom Nom

 

What is your favorite fruit dish?

 

 

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